Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Well That Was Awkward!

Traveling to different places is always an adventure. Especially when there are different languages, customs, and on occasion, unruly beagles involved. We have been in Belgium for almost two months now and since our arrival I've experienced a few unexpectedly embarrassing moments that I thought I should take the time to write down, if for no other reason than to look back on one day for a good laugh.

     The first awkward occurance happened about a month ago on my way home from the grocery store. Whenever we move to a new post, we are car-less until our vehicle arrives and makes it through customs. It's not too bad, (Love the public transportation in Brussels!) except when it comes to grocery shopping. Typically I wait to shop on the weekends when I can bring Dan and the kids to help me carry bags, but on this particular afternoon, we were out of pretty much everything, and unless I was planning to feed my family jarred pickles and mayonnaise for dinner, it was necessary to make a run to the store on my own. I packed four, large, cloth bags in my purse and took off. I had every intention of buying only what we needed, but of course, the breads here look amazing and the cheese, and chocolate, and before I knew it, all four bags were stuffed full and I was packing everything home like a donkey.
    I must have looked even more ridiculous than I felt, because half way home, a handsome man in a creepy, white, utility van pulled over and with a concerned expression asked me (in French) if he could help and give me a ride home. Of course the ride would have been great, but common sense dictated that hopping into a stranger's van would probably not have been a good idea, and so I politely declined. The man gave me an expression that basically said, "Suit yourself, crazy lady." and took off up the street. I laughed and after a bit of effort, restarted my forward momentum and made it home ten minutes later with bruised shoulders and wounded pride. I will say, that my husband was happy later that day when I texted him about my choice to decline the ride. :)

  My second awkward story took place on the metro. I was on my way the kid's school to meet Ellie for a library party. She had worked her tail off to read a certain number of books in time to go to the party (even though she had only just started school a few weeks earlier). I had made my switch from one train line to another and was seated happily by myself with my music and headphones, when a short, incredibly muscular man stepped onboard. We'll just say that the man was very conscious of his appearance. His spiky hair, leather jacket, indoor shades and cologne spoke volumes. So, anyway, even though there were a number of seats available, this guy chose a spot directly beside me and proceeded to lean forward to adjust the laces on his boot.
All that was fine, I'm used to sitting close to people on the metro, but then, almost on cue, a spider (a really BIG spider) dropped down from the ceiling of the car and landed on his back. I clenched my fist to keep myself from brushing it off (he was a complete stranger after all), but then the spider turned and started creeping right towards me. That was it, game over. There was no way I was going to let it get to me,  so I quickly brushed it off. The man, feeling my touch on his back, sat up and looked at me with a disgusted glare. I put my hands up and said (in French) "there was a ... a ..." and then my mind went blank and I couldn't remember the word for spider and so I made up a word that was way off and the guy just shook his head and scooted over three seats away from me, while I sat looking like an idiot (or a creeper) until the next metro station where I got off, even though it wasn't my stop. Even now, I'm sitting here laughing, because it was so incredibly awkward, and the guy doesn't even know or appreciate that I saved him from the rabid spider!

     Finally, my third awkward moment. This time I wasn't alone. I had with me my daughter, my son  (who has a tendency to laugh even when he shouldn't) and my beagle, Lola. We were out for a lovely stroll a few weeks ago. My son and I were walking (he was holding the leash for Lola), while my daughter was on her roller blades.  I have to interject here and say, that for the record, Lola is a very gentle, fun-loving animal. She is great with kids and babies and really is the perfect dog for us. That being said, she has a mild defect which, on occasion, causes problems.
    She doesn't like carts on wheels. Bikes are fine, roller blades are fine, she has no problem with cars or motorcycles or anything like that, but when it is a cart (like, say ... a baby stroller) she freaks out and goes into full "hair-raised, aggressive barking" mode. We are working on this and we've gotten to a point now where if I see a stroller coming, I pull her aside and she remains calm enough until it passes.
    But, on this particular outing she met a new kind of cart on wheels, in the form of a little old man in a wheelchair. I am embarassed to say, that I have never seen her so angry before. She started barking well before we approached the man, and it was not a "somewhat annoyed" bark, it was a full-on "angry" bark. I took the leash from my son and tried pulling her to the side as the man passed but she clearly wanted to attack his chair. I apologized profusely (once again, in French) but he didn't even look at me. He stared straight ahead and passed by with a red, angry face. I turned around to see my son laughing at the ridiculous situation and felt even more embarrassed. The poor man. All he wanted was some fresh air and he got us.
    My son and I had a serious talk about how it must have made the man feel to see him laughing like that and he understood and felt bad for laughing. All I can say is, wow. Sometimes life just tosses you into ridiculous situations that no amount of explaining (In French or English!) can get you out of.

I'm sure there are plenty of other experiences waiting for me, and with the communication barriers I face, my foot will end up in my mouth again. I just hope that when it does happen, I can laugh at myself and those situations and embrace the awkwardness that is sometimes life!

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